(pt.3) The Vicious Creature Punching me in the face, the stomach,breaking my legs,etc

Well
the world advised me to call him or e-mail him and when I mean the world I mean THE WORLD. Everyone from rock stars, to my friends, to anonymous people told me to e-mail him when I told them my situation and so I did, asked him if he knew when we were getting our grades.
Maybe he could see through that e-mail which in reality it spelled something: D.A.T.E. He answered back and asked me a question concerning school; I answered it back but got no reply. Maybe because I didn’t ask him a question so the WORLD now told me to ask HIM out. So after a few days, I asked him if he wanted to see the new batman movie when it came out and I sort of questioned if he liked Batman (which is a surefire reply from a boy) but no answer til this day.

I don’t want to call him a douchebag, I know he’s nice and forgetful at times but I’m just gonna give up on the whole calling/emailing him. I don’t want to be a bother to him or him thinking I'm a stalker and I just don’t like to initiate everything. I’m not regretting what I did, I’m regretting the aftermath of it. Maybe He found out that thing I had written on his book.

And it wasn’t like I was in love with him, when I look for a beatles song to think of him, I can’t because they all say “love” or “heart” which makes my head go “no-no”. I wish they’d written a song about “liking” someone.

I don’t know, I wished that we could have had something, I’m trying to erase the images I had of him and me holding hands in the dark movie theatre, talking about flicks, influencing him with my rock music, make-out sessions, etc.

And even though the creature taunts me with those images every time I check my email or my voicemail messages, when it comes to Tim, I will try to remember only the time he turned around for me.
And how cute he looked.

I don’t know why I think of the sadness of this story with this song, but I do.

LightSpeed Champion’s “tell me what Its worth”

"come hither"

It’s been more than a week and I’m still thinking of the “come hither” rock star. As I play him on my MP3, I feel like he is whispering in my ear, singing to me. I promised myself that this would be the last weekend to fantasize about him and then have the vicious creature take over but it’s still on my mind. He definitely took my mind away from a current failed love interest so I thank him for it, but it has made me feel too whimsy and naïve. So starting today, I will go and check on you tube interviews, concerts of him and his band and I will face my reality that I’m just another girl. Please note I don’t seek pleasure in doing this but what’s worse, finding out you’re just another girl as you see him doing the same thing to a prettier girl on the web in the privacy of your own home OR going to see them live or at a music event such as a CD signing and seeing the guy you thought about for weeks, the star of your daydreams blow you off and flirting with another girl in front of you, your heart being so broken and smashed that you have to scrape it from the wall you were leaning against? I rather feel disappointed and realistic on my home computer for a day than feeling depressed for weeks.